Working on a piece of jewelry today, thinking about being joyful... I sing when I work, and it is because I am so happy to be doing what I love. I think that is the best sign of a joyous heart... singing.
There are so many times in life that you don't feel like singing. When you get fired or when you wreck your car, or when a loved one dies. the old song goes, Rejoice in the Lord always, and again I say rejoice...
I had a rough marriage to a man that ended up being polar opposite to me... and I was miserable. When we first married I sang all the time, hummed, whistled, and at the end of our 17 years together, I was a bitter, silent woman. I am sure he didn't feel like singing either. I am a hard person to get along with. I am set in my ways and I am pretty opinionated.
My ex and I had fought for so many years that I was a changed woman. I didn't sing anymore, and I felt like there was a weight around my neck, dragging me under in a swift current. It wasn't fun at all. Not the reconciliation type arguments either. They were the below the belt, mean fights. He would always say things that were never possible to take back or possible for me to forget. I held my tongue for years and years, wanting to say things but knowing that once said... that would be it, I would be done.
When I had enough, I lashed out and said the things that I needed to say, and it was over. My marriage was over, my whole life was over. I moved away, leaving my childhood home to him, and left the thought of ever being happy again. But you know what? Life had surprises in store for me. I met a man while at a High School class reunion, someone that I vaguely remembered from school... and he made me laugh. Just over two years later, I married him. He made me laugh, not that contrived laugh or politeness... he made me giggle, guffaw and actually made me smile inside.
I never thought I'd be able to have more kids... but the year after we were married, I had a son... and we were truly a family.
The years passed much too quickly, and there were too few of them... and my love, my life passed away. Suddenly and without warning, he was gone.. and I was left to pick up the pieces and to raise our son without him...
I never thought that I would be able to be joyous again... but... just the thought of my love, our love... makes all things a bit brighter. God was with me, carrying me through the dark times, helping me to cope, to bear the loss of my darling husband. And he helped me to remember that I was, for that brief moment of time... able to laugh. To love. To be whole.
Now I can laugh again, with funny stories, fun memories and the knowledge that there are few people that really find a person that makes them whole. That renews their faith and their joy. There are few people that really find their " soul-mates" and I am one of the lucky ones. Yes, it was a brief moment, it was too short a time to be together, and if I had my way, we would have had 75 years together rather than the 7 that we did. But I would not begrudge heaven of the laughter that rings now throughout the place... I am sure all the jokes and the fun that he is having with my brother... who passed only a month before my husband... is bring joy to the angles.
I can laugh, I can find joy in simple things again... that because I found love and peace...I opened my heart to someone, but not just to him... I opened it to God and to the peace that he provides. I had forgotten that.. I had forgotten that he does provide... we just hae to be able to accept what he puts before us... and of that, I am truly joyous.
There are so many times in life that you don't feel like singing. When you get fired or when you wreck your car, or when a loved one dies. the old song goes, Rejoice in the Lord always, and again I say rejoice...
I had a rough marriage to a man that ended up being polar opposite to me... and I was miserable. When we first married I sang all the time, hummed, whistled, and at the end of our 17 years together, I was a bitter, silent woman. I am sure he didn't feel like singing either. I am a hard person to get along with. I am set in my ways and I am pretty opinionated.
My ex and I had fought for so many years that I was a changed woman. I didn't sing anymore, and I felt like there was a weight around my neck, dragging me under in a swift current. It wasn't fun at all. Not the reconciliation type arguments either. They were the below the belt, mean fights. He would always say things that were never possible to take back or possible for me to forget. I held my tongue for years and years, wanting to say things but knowing that once said... that would be it, I would be done.
When I had enough, I lashed out and said the things that I needed to say, and it was over. My marriage was over, my whole life was over. I moved away, leaving my childhood home to him, and left the thought of ever being happy again. But you know what? Life had surprises in store for me. I met a man while at a High School class reunion, someone that I vaguely remembered from school... and he made me laugh. Just over two years later, I married him. He made me laugh, not that contrived laugh or politeness... he made me giggle, guffaw and actually made me smile inside.
I never thought I'd be able to have more kids... but the year after we were married, I had a son... and we were truly a family.
The years passed much too quickly, and there were too few of them... and my love, my life passed away. Suddenly and without warning, he was gone.. and I was left to pick up the pieces and to raise our son without him...
I never thought that I would be able to be joyous again... but... just the thought of my love, our love... makes all things a bit brighter. God was with me, carrying me through the dark times, helping me to cope, to bear the loss of my darling husband. And he helped me to remember that I was, for that brief moment of time... able to laugh. To love. To be whole.
Now I can laugh again, with funny stories, fun memories and the knowledge that there are few people that really find a person that makes them whole. That renews their faith and their joy. There are few people that really find their " soul-mates" and I am one of the lucky ones. Yes, it was a brief moment, it was too short a time to be together, and if I had my way, we would have had 75 years together rather than the 7 that we did. But I would not begrudge heaven of the laughter that rings now throughout the place... I am sure all the jokes and the fun that he is having with my brother... who passed only a month before my husband... is bring joy to the angles.
I can laugh, I can find joy in simple things again... that because I found love and peace...I opened my heart to someone, but not just to him... I opened it to God and to the peace that he provides. I had forgotten that.. I had forgotten that he does provide... we just hae to be able to accept what he puts before us... and of that, I am truly joyous.
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